Episode 186
The 5 Steps to Being an Active Listener
In a world vying for attention, being a great listener sets you apart. Active listening is not just a skill; it's a superpower that can enhance your networking skills, build authentic relationships, and propel your career and personal growth.
Listen in as I dive into the art of active listening with 5 practical steps to elevate your conversations and networking experiences.
Drink of the week….Leap Year Cocktail
10 Questions to Ask Instead of What Do You Do?
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Julie Brown:
Transcript
Has this ever happened to you?
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:You're at an event and
you're talking to someone.
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:Your like sharing your thoughts or
maybe a personal story and you realize
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:the other person, isn't fully present.
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:I their lack of attention is obvious.
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:They've got a distracted
gays or perhaps absent nods.
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:They're glancing around the room or worse.
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:They take out their phone and
check it while you're talking.
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:It feels like your words
are falling on deaf ears.
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:And your frustration mounts, as you
recognize that the other person is
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:completely disinterested or preoccupied.
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:Or perhaps it's been the other way
around, perhaps you've been the one,
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:not listening to somebody at an event.
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:The essence of communication lies in the
mutual exchange of ideas and emotions.
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:And when the listener isn't
invested, it undermines the entire
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:purpose of the conversation.
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:Like why are you having it anyways?
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:Welcome to episode 180
6 of this shit works.
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:A podcast dedicated to all
things, networking, relationship
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:building and business development.
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:I'm your host, Julie Brown.
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:Speaker author and networking coach.
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:And today I'm giving you five steps
for active listening that you can
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:start using today for better and
more meaningful conversations.
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:Okay.
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:We can all agree.
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:It is fucking annoying when we are
talking to someone and we know that
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:we don't have their full attention.
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:We know that they're
only kind of listening.
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:But would we notice if we were
doing it to someone ounce?
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:Like I said, effective
communication requires genuine
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:participation from both parties.
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:And when someone fails to
contribute their attention, it
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:undermines the entire exchange.
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:It can literally sink you're networking
conversations, not just networking
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:conversations, all of your conversations.
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:So before we get into the nitty-gritty
of how to be a more active listener,
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:let's first take a moment to understand,
like, what is active listening anyways?
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:Well, Active listening is more than
just hearing the words it's about
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:fully engaging with the speaker.
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:Understanding their perspective and
responding in a way that demonstrates
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:that you're being attentive.
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:I think you probably already
know, but why does this matter?
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:Especially in the context of networking?
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:Well, networking is all about building
meaningful connections and active
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:listening is the secret sauce.
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:That can take your networking
skills to the next level.
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:Let's break down how you can become
a master at active listening and
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:leverage it to transform not just
your networking experiences, but all
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:of your conversations going forward.
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:Ready.
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:Okay.
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:Step one, put away those fucking
distractions in our hyper-connected world.
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:It's easy to get distracted by mostly our
phones, to be honest, but also the hustle
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:and bustle of what's happening around us.
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:When you're engaged in conversation,
especially in a networking
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:setting, make a conscious effort
to put away those distractions.
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:Keep your phone in your bag.
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:Or in your pocket and don't
constantly look at your iWatch
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:every time it buzzes, just let it
buys and don't pay attention to it.
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:Give your full attention to the
person you're speaking with this.
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:Not only shows respect.
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:But it allows you to absorb the
information more effectively.
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:Step two.
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:Make eye contact.
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:Eye contact is a powerful nonverbal cue
that communicates your focus and interest.
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:It creates a connection between you and
the speaker, making them feel valued.
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:Now I'm not saying you need to
steer intensely into their eyes.
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:Don't be fucking weird, but
maintaining a comfortable level of
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:eye contact can make a significant
difference in how your communication.
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:Is perceived.
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:Step three.
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:Nod and provide feedback, show that you're
actively engaged in the conversation by
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:nodding your head and using verbal cues.
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:Like I see that makes sense.
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:Or like me and theoretically yes.
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:Or same girl, same.
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:This not only encourages
the speaker to continue.
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:But also signals that you're
genuinely listening and you're
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:processing what they're saying.
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:Step four.
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:Paraphrase and ask clarifying questions.
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:Don't just passively listen, actively
engage with what the person is saying.
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:You're not cutting them off.
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:You're paraphrasing what the
speaker has said and actively
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:demonstrating your understanding.
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:But this also encourages a
deeper level of communication.
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:It shows that you are invested in
the conversation and interested in
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:gaining a more thorough understanding.
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:And step five.
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:Be mindful of your body language.
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:Yeah.
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:Your body language speaks volumes.
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:Open and welcoming gestures, convey
warmth and receptiveness while closed
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:off body language can create a barrier.
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:We all know this.
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:So be mindful of your posture, not
just your posture, but your facial
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:expressions and your gestures.
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:Uh, welcoming and open demeanor
will make that networking experience
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:more positive and more memorable.
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:Okay.
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:Got those five steps wound 2, 3, 4, 5.
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:Now let's talk about how active listening
can transform your networking efforts.
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:When you truly listen, you
gain a deeper understanding of
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:the people you interact with.
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:This understanding goes beyond surface
level information and allows you to
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:identify common interests, which I talk
about all the time on this podcast.
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:Shared goals, perhaps
you have shared goals.
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:Potential areas for collaboration, it
builds trust and rapport, and, you know,
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:that's just essential for establishing
those meaningful connections that we're
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:all trying to achieve additionally
active listening can help you stand
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:out in a crowd like in a world where
everyone is vying for attention,
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:being the person who sits back and is
a great listener can set you apart.
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:People appreciate being heard.
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:And they are more likely to remember
someone who took the time to listen to
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:them and to understand them than the
person who just talked to the entire time.
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:So.
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:Active listening.
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:It's not just communication skill.
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:It's your super power that can
transform your networking experiences.
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:Again, here.
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:We're just like real quick recap, putting
away distractions, making eye contact,
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:providing feedback, paraphrasing,
being mindful of that body language
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:and truly engaging with others.
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:You're not going to enhance just your
networking skills, but you're going
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:to create authentic and meaningful
relationships that can propel your career.
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:And your personal growth.
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:Okay.
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:Onto the drink of the week, which
has nothing to do with listening, but
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:everything to do with the fact that
tomorrow is leap day, February 29th,
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:which only happens every four years.
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:So this week, the cocktail
is the leap year cocktail.
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:The Savoy cocktail book states.
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:This cocktail was created by
Harry Craddick for the leap year
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:celebrations at the Savoy hotel
in London on February 29th.
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:1928.
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:It is said to have been responsible
for more proposals than any other
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:cocktail that has ever been mixed.
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:Well, I don't know about that, but
I love me a good cocktail backstory.
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:Here's what you're going to need.
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:Two ounces of gin, a
half ounce of grim and.
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:A half ounce of sweet vermouth
and a dash of lemon juice.
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:Pour all of those green ingredients
into a cocktail shaker though
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:with ice shake for 10 seconds or
so until it's frigging cold and.
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:straight into a chilled cocktail glass.
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:Twist a piece of lemon peel
over the drink for a garnish.
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:All right, friends.
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:That's all for this week.
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:If you like what you heard
today, please leave a review
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:and subscribe to the podcast.
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:Also, please remember to share the podcast
to help it reach a larger audience.
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:If you want more, Julie
Brown, you can find my book.
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:This shit works on Amazon
or Barnes and noble.
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:You can find me on
LinkedIn at Julie Brown PD.
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:Just let me know where you
found me when you reach out.
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:I am Julia Brown underscore BD
on the Instagram, or you can just
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:pop on over to my website, Julie
Brown pd.com until next week.
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:Chairs.