Episode 186

The 5 Steps to Being an Active Listener

Published on: 28th February, 2024

In a world vying for attention, being a great listener sets you apart. Active listening is not just a skill; it's a superpower that can enhance your networking skills, build authentic relationships, and propel your career and personal growth.

Listen in as I dive into the art of active listening with 5 practical steps to elevate your conversations and networking experiences.


Drink of the week….Leap Year Cocktail 


10 Questions to Ask Instead of What Do You Do?


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Transcript
Speaker:

Has this ever happened to you?

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You're at an event and

you're talking to someone.

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Your like sharing your thoughts or

maybe a personal story and you realize

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the other person, isn't fully present.

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I their lack of attention is obvious.

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They've got a distracted

gays or perhaps absent nods.

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They're glancing around the room or worse.

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They take out their phone and

check it while you're talking.

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It feels like your words

are falling on deaf ears.

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And your frustration mounts, as you

recognize that the other person is

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completely disinterested or preoccupied.

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Or perhaps it's been the other way

around, perhaps you've been the one,

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not listening to somebody at an event.

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The essence of communication lies in the

mutual exchange of ideas and emotions.

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And when the listener isn't

invested, it undermines the entire

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purpose of the conversation.

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Like why are you having it anyways?

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Welcome to episode 180

6 of this shit works.

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A podcast dedicated to all

things, networking, relationship

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building and business development.

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I'm your host, Julie Brown.

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Speaker author and networking coach.

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And today I'm giving you five steps

for active listening that you can

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start using today for better and

more meaningful conversations.

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Okay.

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We can all agree.

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It is fucking annoying when we are

talking to someone and we know that

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we don't have their full attention.

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We know that they're

only kind of listening.

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But would we notice if we were

doing it to someone ounce?

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Like I said, effective

communication requires genuine

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participation from both parties.

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And when someone fails to

contribute their attention, it

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undermines the entire exchange.

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It can literally sink you're networking

conversations, not just networking

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conversations, all of your conversations.

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So before we get into the nitty-gritty

of how to be a more active listener,

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let's first take a moment to understand,

like, what is active listening anyways?

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Well, Active listening is more than

just hearing the words it's about

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fully engaging with the speaker.

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Understanding their perspective and

responding in a way that demonstrates

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that you're being attentive.

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I think you probably already

know, but why does this matter?

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Especially in the context of networking?

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Well, networking is all about building

meaningful connections and active

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listening is the secret sauce.

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That can take your networking

skills to the next level.

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Let's break down how you can become

a master at active listening and

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leverage it to transform not just

your networking experiences, but all

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of your conversations going forward.

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Ready.

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Okay.

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Step one, put away those fucking

distractions in our hyper-connected world.

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It's easy to get distracted by mostly our

phones, to be honest, but also the hustle

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and bustle of what's happening around us.

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When you're engaged in conversation,

especially in a networking

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setting, make a conscious effort

to put away those distractions.

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Keep your phone in your bag.

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Or in your pocket and don't

constantly look at your iWatch

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every time it buzzes, just let it

buys and don't pay attention to it.

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Give your full attention to the

person you're speaking with this.

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Not only shows respect.

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But it allows you to absorb the

information more effectively.

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Step two.

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Make eye contact.

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Eye contact is a powerful nonverbal cue

that communicates your focus and interest.

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It creates a connection between you and

the speaker, making them feel valued.

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Now I'm not saying you need to

steer intensely into their eyes.

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Don't be fucking weird, but

maintaining a comfortable level of

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eye contact can make a significant

difference in how your communication.

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Is perceived.

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Step three.

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Nod and provide feedback, show that you're

actively engaged in the conversation by

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nodding your head and using verbal cues.

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Like I see that makes sense.

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Or like me and theoretically yes.

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Or same girl, same.

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This not only encourages

the speaker to continue.

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But also signals that you're

genuinely listening and you're

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processing what they're saying.

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Step four.

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Paraphrase and ask clarifying questions.

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Don't just passively listen, actively

engage with what the person is saying.

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You're not cutting them off.

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You're paraphrasing what the

speaker has said and actively

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demonstrating your understanding.

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But this also encourages a

deeper level of communication.

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It shows that you are invested in

the conversation and interested in

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gaining a more thorough understanding.

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And step five.

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Be mindful of your body language.

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Yeah.

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Your body language speaks volumes.

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Open and welcoming gestures, convey

warmth and receptiveness while closed

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off body language can create a barrier.

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We all know this.

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So be mindful of your posture, not

just your posture, but your facial

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expressions and your gestures.

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Uh, welcoming and open demeanor

will make that networking experience

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more positive and more memorable.

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Okay.

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Got those five steps wound 2, 3, 4, 5.

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Now let's talk about how active listening

can transform your networking efforts.

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When you truly listen, you

gain a deeper understanding of

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the people you interact with.

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This understanding goes beyond surface

level information and allows you to

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identify common interests, which I talk

about all the time on this podcast.

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Shared goals, perhaps

you have shared goals.

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Potential areas for collaboration, it

builds trust and rapport, and, you know,

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that's just essential for establishing

those meaningful connections that we're

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all trying to achieve additionally

active listening can help you stand

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out in a crowd like in a world where

everyone is vying for attention,

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being the person who sits back and is

a great listener can set you apart.

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People appreciate being heard.

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And they are more likely to remember

someone who took the time to listen to

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them and to understand them than the

person who just talked to the entire time.

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So.

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Active listening.

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It's not just communication skill.

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It's your super power that can

transform your networking experiences.

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Again, here.

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We're just like real quick recap, putting

away distractions, making eye contact,

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providing feedback, paraphrasing,

being mindful of that body language

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and truly engaging with others.

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You're not going to enhance just your

networking skills, but you're going

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to create authentic and meaningful

relationships that can propel your career.

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And your personal growth.

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Okay.

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Onto the drink of the week, which

has nothing to do with listening, but

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everything to do with the fact that

tomorrow is leap day, February 29th,

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which only happens every four years.

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So this week, the cocktail

is the leap year cocktail.

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The Savoy cocktail book states.

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This cocktail was created by

Harry Craddick for the leap year

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celebrations at the Savoy hotel

in London on February 29th.

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1928.

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It is said to have been responsible

for more proposals than any other

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cocktail that has ever been mixed.

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Well, I don't know about that, but

I love me a good cocktail backstory.

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Here's what you're going to need.

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Two ounces of gin, a

half ounce of grim and.

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A half ounce of sweet vermouth

and a dash of lemon juice.

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Pour all of those green ingredients

into a cocktail shaker though

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with ice shake for 10 seconds or

so until it's frigging cold and.

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straight into a chilled cocktail glass.

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Twist a piece of lemon peel

over the drink for a garnish.

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All right, friends.

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That's all for this week.

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If you like what you heard

today, please leave a review

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and subscribe to the podcast.

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Also, please remember to share the podcast

to help it reach a larger audience.

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If you want more, Julie

Brown, you can find my book.

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This shit works on Amazon

or Barnes and noble.

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You can find me on

LinkedIn at Julie Brown PD.

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Just let me know where you

found me when you reach out.

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I am Julia Brown underscore BD

on the Instagram, or you can just

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pop on over to my website, Julie

Brown pd.com until next week.

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Chairs.

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About the Podcast

This Shit Works
The people you meet can 100% Change Your Life! Networking is how you meet those people. Which sucks because you hate networking, you think you're bad at networking, and you certainly don’t have time to network. Bullshit! Welcome to This Shit Works, a weekly podcast hosted by entrepreneur, CEO, public speaker, author, business development strategist and networking coach Julie Brown. Just don’t call her Downtown Julie Brown - she doesn’t like that.

Each week Julie will bring to you her no nonsense tips, tricks and conversations around networking your way to more friends, more adventures and way more success!
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